Will it ever

There are so many things that run through my head day in and day out.  I at least think about whether today is my last day with my children well every min.  Today I  face the facts of my husband family wants more for him then me.  Everyone is nice,  but I feel it. I couldn’t agree more! I often ask why he would want to create a life with me knowing it could be gone any minute. I am by far perfect and clearly have a lot of baggage.